A CHEATING man of Chifunabuli District of Luapula Province who chased his wife to marry his girlfriend has forced neighbours and relatives into singing “wechilibwe chakale” at his funeral sooner than expected after the girlfriend reconciled with her ex husband.
According to Luapula Province police commissioner Mwala Yuyi, 34 year old John Sondashi decided to deregister himself from life’s registration book the day he found out that the girlfriend he chose over his wife preferred her ex husband’s urinating organ to his.
Yuyi told Kalemba that Sondashi, with an insatiable appetite for 23 year olds, divorced his 23 year old wife last month and promised to marry a 23 year old divorcee, Matildah Kabale who used her Bemba thieving skills to steal him from the wife.
Before promising Matildah marriage, she would smile, kneel down for him and give him a lying down ovation, kneeling to the ground and clapping in respect, like a politician during campaigns.
“The deceased chased his wife f/Mary mwansa, who later left for Ndola to her family house,” he said.
However, life didn’t offer Sondashi the freedom and happiness he imagined after chasing his wife.
Before he could even enter his lover’s wide open reproductive garden, Sondashi was left traumatised to discover that the sugary hole he salivated over was being drilled and watered by his rival’s urinating tool.
It was also discovered that the girlfriend and her ex husband were planning to move in back together.
Unlike his namesake, this particular Sondashi could not come up with any formula to redeem himself from the heartbreak and opted to go and chill with the lifeless.
On Tuesday, around 04, while husbands were waking up their wives for morning glory, Sondashi breathed his last.
“On 4th November 2025 at around 19:00hrs, the deceased confronted the girlfriend in front of her parents in their house, that if she does not marry him, he will kill himself in front of the girlfriend’s house, fortunate enough, the father to his girlfriend, Peter Kabale aged 65 years managed to calm the situation. The now deceased left and his girlfriend also later left her parent’s house.
“Unfortunately the reporter around 04 discovered that his brother in-law had taken his life by hanging himself using a bedsheet at the door step of his girlfriend’s house, thereafter, he reported the matter to the police and the police rushed to the scene where they confirmed the incident has reported. Physical inspection The body showed a protruding tongue. Thereafter, the body was picked and deposited at Lubwe mission hospital mortuary, awaiting postmortem as the family suspect foul play,” said Yuyi.
By Catherine Pule
Picture for illustration
Kalemba, November 10, 2025
