Guest Article: Response to bed wetting as a grown up


Good afternoon Kalemba management and everyone present. My identity should be kept confidential.

I’m writing to comment on a post that captured my full attention as I could relate to my own experience. The post was shared on your page a day ago and read:

“I have a 13-year-old son who still wets his bed. Punishing him doesn’t seem to work. He can’t go for any overnight visits, and I don’t know how he would cope in boarding school. Please help!”

Personally, I stopped bedwetting when I was 25 years old, and now I’m 33. The last time I bedwet was in 2016, during my third year at UNZA.

In my teenage years in the village, I envied peers who didn’t bedwet. It was a scenario where embarrassment was extreme, but I found myself doing it. It was a situation where you sleep around 21, and in the morning, you discover you’ve already watered the garden. The smell of my bedding was disgusting.

My fellow kids mocked me, and it hurt. At one point, I considered asking my mom to take me to a witch doctor for solutions, but I didn’t know where to start.

Two things I discovered:

  1. During the cold season, I bedwet almost every day, unlike during the rainy/hot season.
  2. As I grew older, the frequency of bedwetting reduced. Between 9-13, I bedwet more than when I was 15-19. I think when I was young, I found it normal, but I hated it more as I got older and wiser.

From 9-13, I bedwet frequently. Above 16, the frequency reduced. At 20, I bedwet 3 to 5 times per year. At 21, maybe once or twice per year.

In 2012, at 21, I bedwet while sleeping with friends in Lusaka. Luckily, they didn’t notice. I washed the beddings immediately, but they didn’t dry due to cloudy June weather.

In 2016, the breaking news was a year passing without bedwetting. I didn’t believe it then, and I still find it hard to believe. But after 8 years, I can confidently say, “I’m free from the ordeal. Hallelujah!”

I never used any medicine or sought medical help. I let nature and time take their course.

While my experience may not be generalized, and consulting medical personnel is advisable, my suggestion is to consider visiting a psychologist or a doctor. If their efforts don’t yield results, know that your child ‘is likely’ to heal in the near future, as I did.

CAPTION: File Photo for illustration

Kalemba February 21, 2024


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