Lost with Jack Mumbulu

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Following “up and down” policies, the home secretary jumped into a reliable police helicopter on a “flight to nowhere” while having “one for the air”. When it was airborne and on autopilot, he requested a “test drive” after asking the pilot to write an advert for police recruits. When they landed, obviously by the grace somewhere, they were completely lost, mildly inebriated, “out of sorts” and oblivious to the passage of time.
 
The rotorcraft found locals who were busy campaigning for ward elections, pleasantry surprised that a high-ranking official had finally remembered them. To solidify the fact that the home secretary was better under tourism he knew neither the place he had landed at nor the people he met. Surprised at the turn of events, the red campaigners swore that the “new alien leaders” were completely out of touch with reality or bewitched by the previous regime.
 
Now critics are up in arms saying how can a sheepish leader who does not know where he is going lead a sensitive ministry. Praise singers on the other hand are vociferously furious with the people saying they had missed an opportunity to recognize a great leader who is always on TV. What type of people are they who cannot differentiate dawn from dusk? This is Kwacha!
 
For once, I will not hide where the bread is buttered – how can our people fail a simple test? Where did they get the courage of asking the top official to spell his name? Ati tell us your names kwati ba ku Chipata! The home secretary bedeviled by too much work was very right to feign confusion! He has too much on his table!
 
My intuition is that perhaps Jack like all Mumbulus was just being mischievous by failing to recognize himself, his pilot, the people he met and the familiar town Mwebantu. He is not called the JOAT – Jack-Of-All-Trades for nothing!
 
The author is a social commentator who writes for pleasure
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