I want a man who can give me plenty of sex, Lusaka woman tells Court

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A TWENTY-eight year old woman of Lusaka has publicly poured out her heart’s desire for a man with unrivaled sexual prowess to handle her in bed.
 
Not every woman is after money from men; some need honey, honey, honey and more honey.
 
That’s the case for Anastasia Mtonga of Hellen Kaunda, who told the Lusaka Boma Local Court that her number one motivation for getting married two years ago was to engage in ruthless bedroom WrestleMania but was disappointed that her 32-year husband, Simon Mumba had failed to come to the party.
 
She said being an independent woman who was financially stable, her husband had just one job – to satisfy her bed – but complained that despite her efforts to arouse him by donning luring clothing
and reinforcing his performance with various concoctions, his performance duration on the matrimonial bed was always as brief as a TikTok video or a rooster’s crow.
 
“I want a man who can give me plenty of sex,” Anastasia told the court as she made her case to divorce Mumba with whom she has one child.
 
However, Mumba expressed shock at his wife’s claims that he was a bedroom underperformer.
 
He told the court that Anastasia should have provided another reason for leaving him because as far as he was concerned, the quality of his bedroom performance was Champions League material.
 
“If she knew that my performance in bed was not good, why was she following me around when we were dating?” Mumba asked the court.
 
And delivering judgment in the matter, senior local court justice Mpundu Mwape blew the final whistle to the marriage and ordered Mumba to compensate his ex-wife with K2,000 and to provide monthly maintenance of K400 to his one-year old child.
 
That’s how the marriage linked to lousy bedroom performance and Champions League skill drowned into the ever growing pit of divorce.
 
The child is Mumba’s only face-saver, as he can use in case someone asks him; to “sonta epo wabomba”.
 
Picture for illustration
 
By Mwiche Nalwimba
 
Kalemba September 7, 2022
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